May Is National Masturbation Month: Fap Fap Fap Fap Fap

I have been meaning to post about this all month but I have been too lazy to and the month is almost over so I figured I should probably do this. May is the official masturbation month for some reason. I have no idea why, except maybe that it is the 5th month and the hand  has five fingers on it. That is the only explanation that makes any since to me. I also have no idea who came up with the idea and who votes on this kind of thing, which would be pretty interesting, I should probably Google that:

“In May, 1995, San Francisco–based sex-toy and -education shop Good Vibrations declared May to be “Masturbation Month”. Since then, it has encouraged people to get sponsors as a fundraiser for charities with a sex-positive focus.
In 1999, the Masturbate-a-Thon was originated by the collective Open Enterprises, which operates Good Vibrations. The slogan “Come for a Cause” was coined by Rachel Venning, the founder of the sex toy shop Babeland, formerly Toy in Babeland, which has branches in Seattle, in Brooklyn, and (two) in Manhattan. The Masturbate-a-Thon was built up by Good Vibrations, which encouraged other modern sex-toy businesses— such as Babeland; A Woman’s Touch, in Madison, Wisconsin; Toronto’s Come as You Are; and Boston’s Grand Opening—to hold events coinciding with “masturbation month” (May in the United States). In that year, the first live event was held at San Francisco’s Campus Theater, by the Center for Sex and Culture (CSC)’s Carol Queen and her partner, Robert Lawrence. CSC is an education-based non-profit providing professional-level sex education. The annual events are used as a public-health-education device to increase awareness of self-pleasure as a strategy for safer and healthier sex and to de-stigmatise self-love.
London hosted Europe’s first “masturbate-a-thon” on August 5, 2006. Hundreds of persons raised money for the charity Terrence Higgins Trust and the sexual- and reproductive-health agency Marie Stopes International.The Masturbate-a-thon, also called “Wank-a-Thon”, was recorded by ZigZagProductions of London as part of an international documentary of the event.However, plans to broadcast this on Channel 4 as part of its Wank Week series were abandoned, including programing from Europe’s fetish and leather week.”

Thank you, Wikipedia. That is actually kind of awesome. I know what you’re going to say, “too long, didn’t read”. So here is the cliff notes version: a sex toy company came up with the idea after creating an annual masturbate-a-thon. And apparently a bunch of people gathered somewhere and masturbated in a big room together and were videotaped doing so. Not sure if that is hot or really disturbing, or both. Anyway, they have world records for this shit, and some guy won the record for masturbating for 9 hours and 58 minutes straight, there had to have been extreme chaffing, I hope he moisturized.

May would be cooler if it were also national bacon month then if you could somehow combine masturbation and bacon, now that would be amazing.

National Masturbation Month is brought to you by Harry Potter

3 comments on “May Is National Masturbation Month: Fap Fap Fap Fap Fap

  1. Pingback: The Irony Is Too Much | What I Desired To Say…

  2. Pingback: Don’t Let Your Right Hand Know What the Left Hand is Doing. | Copious Gasser

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